Romantic music, sweaty palms, and nervous glances: all signal the dreaded slow dance. While some couples look forward to this part of the night, those without dates may be left awkwardly on the sidelines.
This year’s homecoming, “Wish the Night Away,” was held at the Hiller Aviation Museum in San Carlos on Nov. 11, and as with any dance, many felt pressure to find a date. Sophomore Chris Ho says, “[People try to find a date] because [they] like the person or because of the social attention you get for having a date. They also might just want a companion to go with.” Junior Alex Burns adds, “People go with a date so they don’t feel left out.”
Traditionally, it seems like boys have the upper hand in deciding whether they want to go with a date or not. Junior Nicole Nasser says, “Guys have more pressure to ask a girl because it’s the stereotypical thing; girls typically don’t ask guys.” Junior Nathaniel Ramil concurs, “There’s more pressure for the guy because they have to ask, but girls want to be asked.”
However, many do not view going to homecoming without a date as unfavorable. Senior Jacqueline Young says, “I guess in general they don’t look down in a derogatory manner at those who go stag.” Ramil adds “I don’t think there’s a problem with that [going stag] because you’re just going to have fun and you don’t need a date.”
Although the idea of going stag is increasingly common among students, it also carries a negative connotation. Ho says, “When people think of stag they often associate it with a person who isn’t confident enough to ask a girl or isn’t good enough to get one. They don’t realize that maybe the person just doesn’t have interest in asking or they don’t feel sympathy toward that person in the cast that they might be rejected.”
Others view it as an inability to find a date. Sophomore Brandon Dere observes, “I think [that other students go stag] because they [can’t] find anyone to go with or the other person rejected them.” “I think other people might judge them. They might think they’re loners,” adds senior Colin Grele.
This social stigma may contribute to lower attendance rates. Dere says “I probably wouldn’t go to Homecoming if I didn’t have a date because it would be awkward.” Junior Jennifer Banuelos added, “I’m not going to Homecoming because I don’t have a date and none of my friends are going.”
Some students went to homecoming whether they had a date or not. Ho says, “For me, personally, I would still go to Homecoming because it’s fun and part of the high school experience. I [also] want to be able to support my friends. [However,] some people don’t have the courage to show up alone.”
When asked what going to the dance without a date was like, sophomore Marina Chavez said, “It was actually really fun.” Freshman Quinn Manely added, “It was fine. It was still fun hanging out with friends.”
For other dateless students, the experience was not as enjoyable. Freshman Netta Wang says, “Going stag was awkward at times.” “[I was] lonely when they got frisky on the dance floor,” says freshman Regina Wen.
Although some students still view those who go to Homecoming stag as people that could not find dates, this adverse view of going stag is not very common. Students are increasingly more acceptant of those willing to have fun without dates. However, this largely depends on the individual. Ramil says, “It’s up to you if you can have fun without a date.”
