“As a parent, I believe discipline is necessary to teach children appropriate behavior, teach them right from wrong and help them establish a habit of good choices,” says teacher Adam Jacobs.
While most parents place their child’s well-being as a top priority, the interpretations of appropriate discipline and effects of such discipline vary from individual to individual.
Jacobs believes that the disciplinary levels should be age-appropriate. “In my experience, discipline for my children usually takes the form of a consequence. Consequences range from a timeout (same number of minutes as the child’s age) to the loss of a privilege,” says Jacobs.
While consequences are a fundamental aspect of discipline, physical consequences remain a controversial reality.
Junior Sammi Donath says, “I believe parents have the right to take things away and to ground their children if they’re misbehaving because that’s not a physical form of punishment, rather more like a psychological form.”
Addressing physical discipline, Jacobs says, “Physical discipline isn’t necessary since there are many other ways to provide consequences for bad choices. Physical discipline can teach a child that it is okay to be physical with somebody as a consequence which could lead to modeling of poor behavior.”
Regarding the difference between discipline and child abuse, Aragon assistant principal Coe says, “Child abuse crosses the line because there are physical marks, cuts, bruising, physical evidence that isn’t just taking someone’s time—it’s actually physically abusing or assaulting someone with force, either by hands, sticks, etc., so there’s literally physical evidence of abuse.”
While parents may implement certain forms of discipline for their child’s wellbeing, they may not always work.
Junior Andre Zhang acknowledges that parent want the best for their kids, saying, “Some parents are very strict about discipline because they probably have experienced the ups and downs of life and only wants what’s best for their kid.”
However, he says, “A lot of teenagers are naturally rebellious, and when parents use discipline, it doesn’t work because they just ignore it.”
To maintain a constructive relationship, Jacobs says, “A balance of positive and negative consequences is ideal so the child is also rewarded for good choices.”
However, while some students feel discipline is necessary, there are students who feel self-discipline is more effective than any other form of discipline.
Zhang, a proponent of self discipline, says, “Discipline is something that you have to learn by yourself. If you aren’t disciplined well enough from an early age, it really shows through your actions and behavior.”
Discipline also varies with the culture and ethnicity of the individual. Coe says, “In my experience different cultures discipline their kids differently. Some take away privileges while others resort to a more physical handling like spanking or hitting, which is usually not the best way, or acceptable way to discipline, just because you’re using physical force.”
Coming from an Asian background, Zhang feels Asian families place a high emphasis on grades, “For a lot of Asian families, grades are extremely important and because of that, discipline and grades are intertwined. Since my middle school years, if I ever got a bad grade, my parents would start complaining and taking away privileges such as video games or hanging out with friends in favor of making me study harder for school .”
Zhang disagrees with his parent’s views, saying, “Discipline should not be all about grades, rather about how one is as a person.”
Similarly, senior Alex Li feels that self-discipline drives him in his everyday life. Li says, “For the most part I am self disciplined, which is partially due to the fact my parents go overseas for business a lot.”
A track athlete Li incorporates his discipline to work harder and be better everyday. Li says, “During track meets and practices, I try to push myself a little bit more everyday. Allowing myself to have my own mental set of goals makes me work harder so I can achieve the tangible result.”
Li believes that everyone will eventually have some degree of self discipline, saying, “For many seniors, they’ll be leaving for college and part of the process of college forces them to have self independence. Where parents used to pick up for them and care for them, they have to fend for themselves.”
Jacobs says, “As long as the consequences are consistent and fair, children will feel comfortable and confident in their choices.”
